Hallie and Travis

This past Monday, Mark and I were quite surprised to have Hallie go nuts when he started to leave for work. She started wailing and crying hysterically, clinging to him and asking him to “cancel work” and “don’t go!” We’re still not sure where that came from. He finally had to peel her off of him and head out the door.

She calmed down eventually, though I couldn’t get her excited in any of our plans for the day. We were heading to meet Caleb and Emma at a park, and we went head with that, though without much enthusiasm from Hallie. Hallie told me she was still going to be crying when we got there and that I should tell everyone why. Later she revised this to say she was going to be quiet the whole time.

Sure enough, when we got to the park and Mandy or Emma said something to her, she wouldn’t answer. I told her she was welcome to feel quiet, and that she could even tell them that she was feeling quiet, but that she couldn’t be rude and she had to give some polite response. Her funk lasted a little longer, but eventually everyone started swinging and moving around.

At one point I was pushing Hallie and Emma in side-by-side swings and listening to them chat away. Suddenly, Hallie looked up like she’d been struck by something. “Mommy!” she announced. “It turns out that I AM talking some today after all!” Apparently this was as surprising to her as she thought it would be to everyone else. I decided I’d hold back on the “I could have told you this would happen” spiel and just share in her joy and wonder at her own transformation. What a funny, funny girl!

Hallie had her first day of preschool today, and it went pretty well. She was really excited about it beforehand, telling her Gum this morning “Mommy got me a BEAUTIFUL outfit to wear for the first day of school.” Everything went fine until we pulled into the parking lot, when she declared that her tummy felt funny. I told her maybe it was like in some stories we’ve read where kids get nervous before something and it makes their tummies feel funny. She seemed to accept this, but still dragged her feet getting out of the car.

Once in the classroom, she didn’t want me to leave. She asked me to introduce her to her new classmates, even though she already knew half the kids there and I explained that Ms. Gretel would introduce her to the others. And she told me that if I left she’d be quiet all day, which I told her was fine. I left, and as expected, she had a great day. Her teacher told me things were fine immediately.

Later in the day, after lunch and Little Gym and T’s nap (no nap for Hallie again, so we played in the rain) we were pretending to be different animals. When Hallie was being a very quiet fawn she told me, “This morning I thought I was going to be like a fawn all day at school today.”

“But you weren’t, were you?” I asked.

“Nope!” she said, with a grin.

“What were you instead?”

“A duck!”

“So, quack quack quack instead of quiet?” I asked.

“Yep. Quack quack quack!” she declared.

Hopefully we’re over that bump and future mornings will be completely smooth.

We’ve been working on getting the kids down for an earlier bedtime, and so far it’s going fairly smoothly. I’m not sure what pushed us over the edge. 9 has always seemed late, but we never seemed to be able to get things done and get them settled earlier. I think experiencing the extra freedom last Sunday’s 8 pm lights out gave us and seeing how the kids are adapting pretty well made it seem possible. Also, on days when Hallie doesn’t nap she’s been asking to go to bed earlier. And it’s easier to do everything at the same time for both of them.

Travis has complained a little bit each night, since he’s still going strong at that time. And I’m not sure either of them is actually falling asleep that much earlier. I can often hear T’s trucks getting pushed around and hear Hallie reading or talking or singing. But with school starting we’re going to need to get going earlier in the mornings so it will help to have things shifted at night. Don’t know how Daylight Savings Time will affect us, but we’ll undoubtedly find out.

Travis continues to amaze us with his language skills. And to think that at 15 months we were worried he was a late talker!

Mostly we’re impressed by how complex and how correct some of his comments are. Yesterday we went around a turn while driving and he pointed out, “Travis’s cup fell over!” And recently I asked both kids to come upstairs so we could get Hallie dressed. Travis, who was playing happily, politely declined. “Not upstairs. Travis just stay downstairs.”

He’s also into using “I want” or “How ’bout?” As in “I want milk” or “How ’bout that book/cup/plate/toy/whatever the item is that’s being chosen?” At a recent doctor’s appointment for Hallie the doctor asked Hallie if the thumb she was sucking tasted like chocolate. Travis immediately announced “I want chocolate!” Which is pretty funny, since he still spits out chocolate whenever he gets any.

I just bought T some new shoes as he’s busting out of everything he’s got. He hasn’t worn socks in months but these shoes need them. I left him in his room holding a pair of socks while I went to do something with Hallie. When I came back, he was in his room with his hand on the diaper pail. First I told him not to play with it. Then I noticed a funny look on his face.

“Travis, did you put something in the diaper pail?” He broke into a huge grin, “Stinky socks. Travis’s stinky socks.” Apparently he thought his socks were stinky and he knows stinky things go in the diaper pail. I tried hard not to laugh in front of him as I retrieved his (now probably stinky) socks and explained where he can put stinky clothes. Yesterday he threw something–I don’t even remember what–in the trash downstairs. I may have to start checking receptacles before we dump them outside!

Travis is still working on pronouns. He does just what Hallie did: “Pick you up” means “pick me up.” It’s funny that they both do that and I’ve never heard that from any other kids. Hallie did it until after she turned three. I wonder how long that will last with Travis? T also hasn’t adopted “mine” but he uses “That’s Travis’s!” with such authority there’s not much need for a synonym.

I can’t quite believe how much happened this weekend. And I wish I could bottle the energy I have had to get so much done! I’m not sure where it came from but I’d be glad for it to stick around.

On Friday night, Hallie’s friend Suzanna came over while her parents had a last pre-baby date. She and Hallie always have lots of noisy fun, with Friday no exception. Our sofa cushions became a pirate ship, and all sorts of adventures were had in the den before John came to gather up Suzanna and we dumped Hallie into bed. (Surpringly, I’d been able to put T to bed even with the bedlam going on downstairs.)

On Saturday, Mark went to an all-day boating class, which left me with the kids and a commitment to help out with the work day at Hallie’s school. I was really anxious about how much I’d be able to contribute while also keeping them safe and happy. Turns out, it was a lot! The kids were great. They either helped me dig or played nearby. Travis was happy banging the different tools on the concrete to hear their sounds or driving his trucks around. And Hallie and some of her classmates enjoyed the swings. I got a really good feeling from some of the new parents I met there and felt nicely charged up about Hallie starting school. Until last week Children’s House was well under-enrolled. Now I think there are only one or two slots left, and one of those might soon be taken. So, we’re off to a good start!

After a quick grocery trip on the way home and then unch it was time for baths (we were all filthy!) and bed. Both kids took super naps, which let me sort out our trip photos and place an ofoto order for everything that’s happened in 2006. That’s a lot of pictures (350ish) but only a fraction of what I had to choose from!

Our disheveled yard, neglected since we left for the beach (and some of it well before that) had started to drive me nuts, so by the time Mark came home I was out with the shears lopping off half our overgrown bushes. Next I battled (and conquered with some help from Mark) the weed whacker to edge our sidewalks and driveway and finished up with some leaf blowing to clean up the leaves from our dying front trees. Mark took charge of the kids when they woke up, and I was free to finish up outside. I told him it was a delightful role reversal for me to by on my own schedule with outside stuff while he handled the kids and got their dinner, etc. Before bed I finished up washing all our sheets and towels and got everyone’s rooms back in order.

This morning was devoted to our sailing (mis)adventures (see other post). As soon as we got home, we joined the tail end of Madison and Elle’s joint birthday party. Then we attempted to get the kids naps, to no avail. But once they were up, I headed back out to finish what I’d started yesterday. I got the grass cut and even trimmed the fence line and a bunch of other overgrown areas. Once again, it was nice to get out on my own a bit while Mark got to spend time with the kids. Though I’m sorry he had to deal with Mr. Destructo (see other post) all on his own. No one should have to face that without backup!

It feels later than it is, since the kids have already been down for 90 minutes. It’s great to catch up on some long overdue posting and still have time to read a bit before bed. Which is what I’m about to do!!

When our sailing expedition today ran later than planned, Travis ended up napping almost an hour in the car around lunchtime. As we feared, this derailed any afternoon nap for him.

We’ve learned in recent months that if he doesn’t get enough of a nap, he morphs into Mr. Destructo. We saw this on our last trip to Virginia, again in Decatur last week, and again this afternoon. He doesn’t get grumpy, he just gets manic. He becomes a whirling dervish, shouting and racing and leaving chaos in his wake. It’s not as if he’s being malicious–he’s just out of control. And when he’s in that state, he doesn’t listen worth anything.

We had so many episodes tonight, I don’t remember what the infraction was that sent me over the edge. I grabbed him and sat him on our back doormat in the den and told him he was in time out and had to sit there until I let him up. I sat right with him, and he mostly stayed there. We got another chance a few moments later to try again. It was a spontaneous placement, but I think that mat will now be his time out area. We never had to have anything like that for Hallie, who’s only had about 5 time outs ever. But I can see we need a toolbox of strategies for Travis and this is an important one.

The single upside to today’s “schedule,” if you can call it that, was an 8 pm bedtime for both kids. Hallie didn’t nap at all and was asking to go to bed by 7:30. Travis clearly needed to be put to bed, for his sake as well as ours. He complained a bit when he saw me wrapping up storytime but surprisingly he settled right down. Mark and I talked last week about striving for 8:30 instead of our current 9 pm. I know 8 is too early, but splitting the difference sure would be nice. But I’d stick with 9 over going through another evening with Mr. Destructo any day!

We got out for our first sail today. It was . . . a learning experience. Ralph Naylor joined us, and his help was invaluable. He and Mark did all the boat work while I tended to the kids.

In hindsight, I should have kept the kids at home. They were excited about going, but it took so long to rig and launch the boat, not to mention the hour-long drive to our chosen launch site, that they’d had about enough before we even got on the water. They were hot in their lifejackets, the wind was light so we didn’t move very fast, and other commitments for us and Ralph meant we didn’t spend much time at all on the water.

There was plenty of whining but also some bursts of enthusiasm from both kids. It was great having the cabin, which is really spacious, for them to go in. We could listen to music and they could color and play with toys. We’ll know better next time what to bring along. And if we set up some rails, they can go below and get their naps while we’re on the water. Overall, the kids were really great sports. Especially T, who stepped in an anthill while we waited for them to pull the boat out and got all bit up before I could whip his shoes off.

Mark and Ralph worked really, really hard for not a lot of reward. But we had to get through our first time on the water, and now we’ve done it. Everything that took so long today will just get easier. Mark is going out with the former owner next weekend. If we can find a sitter, I’d love to go with him. I think we’ll try to go on our own a few times before bringing the kids again. They need to be just a little older to allow us to handle the rigging and launching ourselves without another adult along. I still see lot of potential in the boat–and I can’t wait for my first chance to sail her. We just have our work cut out for us to start with.

During much of our Florida vacation, it seemed like Travis was eating about 3 bites of real food a day–as well as lots of milk and whatever french fries he could get his hands on when we’d go out. It’s likely he wasn’t feeling well some of that time, but it really made it clear that we needed to work on his diet. So, now we’re playing hardball.

One thing we’ve done that’s already seemed to make a difference is limit him to two cups of milk a day. It used to be unlimited, and I’m sure he was drinking 3 or 4. He also 1/3 of a cup of juice mixed with water if he asks for juice. We’re also being very firm with our table rules. He gets what he’s served and that’s it. If he shoves his plate away, he’s done. And if he acts up at the table, he’s done.

Suprisingly, he’s had a couple of decent (by his very low standards) meals in the last few days. He ate a whole hotdog and bun last night and has done well with toasted turkey and cheese sandwiches and frozen vegetables (and I mean frozen–he loves them straight from the freeser) a couple of times. “Well” in this case means about a quarter of a whole sandwich, cut into strips. But that’s progress over eating none of it.

I’m working harder at making real meals. I’m investing my energy there rather than worrying about what he’s actually eating. Everything I’ve read and everyone I’ve talked to supports that approach, and it promises to be a smoother one for everyone. It will just take a little getting used to for T!

(And of course we’re following the same guidelines with Hallie–her food intake is miniscule too, but this seems to be helping her as well. And it sure does work better for us!)

Travis continues to make strides in his language. He’s using several complete sentences now and it’s hard to pinpoint when he made that leap. We’ll now hear things like, “I’m hungry, too!” or “I want some milk, pleash.”

T was happy to demonstrate one favorite sentence on our drive home from the beach. Mark was driving, Hallie was watching a movie, and I was trying to nap to prepare for my stint behind the wheel. I put the neck pillow in place and leaned my head back. Almost immediately I heard, “Whatcha doin’ Mommy?” I ignored it. “Whatcha doin’, Mommy?” “Trying to nap, Travis.” I closed my eyes again. “Whatcha doin’ Mommy?” “Not napping!” I grumbled, accompanied by Mark’s laughter. After a dozen rounds or so, I eventually gave up on that nap and waited until he conked out himself. No rest for the weary when Travis wants your attention!

Despite some very clear communication, there’s LOTS of stuff Travis says that we still don’t understand. If we listen long enough and he’s patient enough to keep repeating himself or provide other information, we can usually figure it out. But there’s still much that remains a mystery.

Travis hasn’t gotten into the typical “mine mine mine” of toddlerhood, but he’s got the concept down. When he sees something he wants, he declares “That’s Travis’s!” Most of the time he knows it’s not. And he usually says that while looking to me for a reaction. He even does it with objects in books, pretending to pluck them from the pages.

He’s into the whole idea of ownership in general. He’ll point to cars in parking lots and declare “Somebody else’s!” When there were toys at the pool I didn’t want him to play with, he’d pronounce “somebody else’s!” We saw one little boy’s truck two days in a row. And soon as Travis saw it the second day he said, “somebody else’s!” He knows what that means and he usually respects it.

Travis is also figuring out issues of time. He knows that “tomorrow” is in the future. To T, “tomorrow” means a time when he might be able to have something he’s currently being denied. So if you say, “No, you can’t have any candy” he’ll announce “Tomorrow!” And when I told him he couldn’t have the truck at the haircut place he declared, “Tomorrow!” It’s not a question, either. He’s very certain that he’ll soon get what he wants. You’ve got to admire his optimism!